As you all know by now, the Atlanta wedding photographers at Atlanta Artistic Weddings love to learn about new cultures and traditions. We see so much diversity in our line of work, which is an awesome thing. To continue this series of blogs, this week I want to tell you a bit about the Chinese culture and their wedding traditions.

When a Chinese groom wishes to propose, ancient custom dictates the parents of the bride and groom negotiate the terms of the marriage and ceremony, including the date, which must line up with a day of luck on the Chinese calendar. Once the proposal is made and accepted, the groom’s family will present the bride’s family with gifts of food and cakes. The bride’s parents will then send these cakes, known as “Double Happiness Cakes”, to relatives and friends, along with invitations, to announce the engagement. These invitations are usually placed in a red envelope inscribed with the Chinese symbol for “double happiness.” The bride’s family, in turn, will provide a dowry list, comprised mainly of items befitting the bride’s social status, that the groom would acquire and present to the family. The day before the wedding, the marriage bed is installed by members of the grooms family who are “lucky”, meaning they have many children and a happy marriage. The bed is then scattered with seeds of various fruits to ensure a “fruitful” marriage.

Like many other cultures, the bride and groom each have a “getting ready” ritual that is performed the morning of the ceremony. During the “hair dressing” ritual, the bride bathes in cleansing oils, then sits in front of lit candles in order to cleanse bad spirits from her system. While she sits in front of the candles, a “lucky” female family member with a happy marriage fixes the brides hair in a style that indicates she is a married woman. This can end up being a very sweet moment between the bride and her mother, who is often a great choice for this position. Likewise, the groom performs a “capping ritual” where he is dressed in traditional attire and kneels at the family altar, a table found in many Chinese homes that is set up with photos of deceased family members where living family members go to pay their respects. While the groom kneels, his father places a ceremonial cap made of cypress leaves onto his head. The groom then bows to the family altar to gain the blessing of his ancestors.

In recent tradition, Chinese brides change outfits multiple times throughout the festivities. It is tradition for the bride to wear a red dress to the ceremony, as red represents luck and prosperity in Chinese culture.  The bride wears a dress called a qipao (cheongsam), with a mandarin collar, or a dress called a Longfeng Gua as well as a coronet with a red silk veil that covers her face. The embroidery on the qipao often includes imagery of a phoenix, a popular symbol for “bride” in China. The bride changes into a different dress for the Tea Ceremony. This dress is still traditional in style, yet more brides are opting to wear the color white for this ceremony. Then, the bride may even choose to change a third and fourth time during the banquet and goodbyes at the end of the night. The groom wears a traditionally black long silk coat over a blue robe with a black cap that has red tassels. Like the bride, the embroidery on the grooms robe contains a dragon, a traditional Chinese symbol for “groom.” Like the bride, he may opt to change for the reception banquets. The couple has generally changed into more traditional attire for these last changes, but in recent years some have opted to change into the traditionally western gown and tux for the end of the night.

Once the bride and groom have both gotten ready, the fun and games begin. The groom will lead his friends and family in a procession from his house to the brides house to pick up his bride and bring her to her new marital home. Most of the time they will walk, although if the brides house is too far, the procession will drive, with the groom in the lead driving a car he decorated himself. On the way, the groom and others in the procession will set off fireworks and bang gongs to ward off evil spirits. Once he gets to the brides house, her bridesmaids will stop him at the door and set him a series of tasks he must complete to prove he is worthy of taking the bride from her parents and childhood home. This can include the groom paying the bridesmaids money in little red envelopes, called “hong bao,” until they are satisfied with the price, answering trivia questions about the bride, or reciting a love vow for her. Once he completes his request, the bridesmaids give up the bride.

The actual marriage ceremony is usually very simple and very small, with only relatives in attendance. The officiating of the marriage usually takes place at the town hall or other small, intimate venue, such as a family altar. During this ceremony, the couple will exchange rings and drink Tsao Chün tea from the same cup while linking arms, and then offer the tea to the parents of the bride and groom. This tea has two lotus seeds or two red dates inside it to aid the couple in having children and the sweetness of the tea represents the hope for a sweet life for the couple. To close the ceremony, the bride and groom bow to each other as a promise of mutual respect in the marriage.

One of the most important aspects to include in marriage festivities in China is the serving of tea multiple times. Tea is seen as a symbol of respect in China, so serving it to loved ones is a way of showing your appreciation of them. The morning of the wedding, before the groom comes with the procession, the bride will pour and serve her parents tea, holding it with two hands, as a thank you for raising her and providing for her. Then, immediately after the officiating of the marriage, the bride and groom hold the Tea Ceremony.  This is where the bride and groom pour Tsao Chün tea, with dates and lotus seeds as before, and serve it with both hands to the elders of the family, as a way to show respect and appreciation for the family they have just joined.  The bride and groom will kneel while the people being served usually sit in chairs and males are typically on the right while females are to the left, which means the bride serves the males while the groom serves the females. The groom’s parents are served first, then it goes by family seniority, which means the grooms grandparents are next, then his aunts and uncles with siblings and cousins being served last. In return, those being served each give the couple a lucky red envelope, which typically contains money for the couple.

In the Chinese culture, there can be many wedding feasts for a number of days after the wedding. However, it is typical for the bride and grooms family to each throw their own wedding banquet to celebrate the couple after the wedding, with the grooms family hosting theirs on the day of the wedding after the Tea Ceremony. These banquets usually have five to ten courses, with the couple changing outfits around course six. All of the food served is meant to symbolize well wishes for the newlyweds, such as lobster representing joy, fish representing a plentiful life, and fowl meaning a peaceful life. Also at this banquet, guests check in by signing the guest book and handing a red envelope with money to the attendants, which may be bridesmaids or “lucky” family members with happy marriages. The attendant counts the money, making sure the amount of cash is an even number for luck, and records it in another book. This is so that, if the bride and groom are invited to the wedding of their guests, they can give a larger amount of money than they received, showing their generosity. Sometimes, a “chinese lion dance” will be performed at the wedding banquet. This is where a couple of dancers dress up in an elaborate, colorful lion costume and perform a ritual dance that is believed to bring joy and happiness to the couple.

On the wedding night, after the festivities of the day, the bridal chamber is lit with two candles, to represent the bride and groom, and the new couple will drink wine from two cups tied together with a red string, to symbolize their union. The candle represents good luck on the couple’s first night as husband and wife. The bride then must eat raw dumplings to commit herself to her new family and her hopes of having children. The bride and groom must stay in this room, sometimes up to three days after the wedding, and relatives can come by and tease the couple. The day after the wedding, the bride awakes at dawn and pays tribute to her ancestors. This is where she is formally introduced to the grooms family. As she is introduced, older relatives will each give her a small gift and they will proceed to give the bride a formal title within their family based on her husbands birth order in the family. After this occurs, she is officially part of the family. Three days after the wedding, the bride and groom visit the bride’s family, where she is welcomed as a guest instead of a relative, now that she has joined a new family. The groom typically brings meat to cook and the newlyweds dine with the brides family.

The more I learn about these cultures and their wedding traditions, the more I realize just how important they are to keep one connected to both the past and the future. Their symbolism is often so beautiful and really heartfelt, and these traditions are no exception.

Thanks again for reading this blog and I hope you enjoyed reading about some of the many meaningful wedding traditions in the Chinese culture!

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